Offley & Stopsley 1 v Pinner Cricket Club Saturday 2nd XI on Sat 24 Jun 2023 at 1300
Pinner Cricket Club Won by 5 wickets

Match report Pinner 2nd XI vs Offley and Stopsley
On a dreary and overcast morning, the mighty Seconds set off on another hour-long adventure in search of another win, from the fact you are reading this report, you already know how it is gone as we currently are not posting reports for our losses. After seeing chances of thunder and seeing a few droplets of rain on the drive down, our hearts sunk. I believe a few of us thought the game would have been called off as half the team was missing come our 12:15 meet, although it is very plausible that we could have been delayed reversing back down the narrow country lanes if another car was coming our way.
Once we had arrived, we were given the grand tour and were shown to our changing ‘box’ and shown the toilets (bushes) just behind the barn (if that’s what we want to call it)? Despite all the obvious issues with their set up, they still had a scorebox! @CommitteeMembers. We went out for our usual pitch inspection and took out our new Vortex toy which gave us our most intense warm up to date. 12:40 came along and the captains went out to toss, having won the toss, Offley elected to bat first, leaving us to go into the field still waiting on our keeper/daddy to arrive. 12:53 (7 minutes to start) we see a rather hungover @KUNAL (probably still from his 2 and a half pints last Saturday) stagger over to us, who was quickly sent inside to change.
So, 12 of us all being here (@CHIV came along too), we the sexiest Pinner team, strutted onto the field. A nervous @NIK and I exchanged a panicked look as we feared for our elbows and knees (no jokes please, very serious stuff here) as we saw a lovely astro carpet exactly where we were fielding in the covers. @SIMRAN took the ball, set his field and away we went. Simran managed to keep his opening over to just 7 (SEVEN!!!) balls this week, much improved from a couple weeks back! A tight opening spell, apart from the wide that made it onto the pitch over (literally the next ground, not the adjacent pitch) from our skipper got us off to a good start going at 5-1-12-0 from his first of two spells. @NICK opened up from the other end, starting very promisingly by bowling their opening bat out on his third ball. Despite this bright start, we quickly saw that Nick was still flustered from his time away in Albania as he tried to take out the next bat’s shoulder and shins by mixing up the length very frequently. Unfortunately, as the ball was way too quick for the bat, Kunal/daddy had quite the tough time stopping these due to a mix of his hangover and concussion, from being flattened by Nick and Omkar’s lovechild who was batting at no.3 for Offley and could not stop his momentum after a quick single. After 4 overs of looking dangerous (to the batters well-being and threatening taking too many wickets before Simran’s second spell), Nick was hooked, ending his spell with 4-0-17-1. After 9 overs, on came our first change bowlers of @SHAUNAK and @ROB. The pair came on and bowled super economically going at 6-2-8-0 and 7-0-23-1 respectively. How Shaunak didn’t get a wicket, we will never know. After consistently hitting great line and length, the batter finally chipped (this is an understatement) one back up to the man himself, who got down on one knee, lay down, made himself a cup of cocoa, had a nap, woke up and then dropped the ball. Not ideal. However, he made up for this by taking 2 much tougher catches, and his figures weren’t bad either. As always, Rob bowled fantastically, bamboozling the batters with every delivery. He finally broke down the partnership by getting the other opener out LBW. Having seen Rob’s seasonal economy better than his own, our skipper decided to take matters into his own hands, or should I say feet? An off drive that had found the gap between mid-off and extra cover was treacling its way to boundary and Simran had conned us all, making us think he cared, by sprinting after the ball like Gorby. As he reached the ball, he channelled his inner gymnast to graciously dive and flick the ball back, before performing a gleeful back tuck and roll, before scissor kicking the ball over the boundary for 4. A feat so bad that even an ever-serious Nik (who was outstanding once again) in the field, couldn’t contain his laughter and broke character, along with all 8 other fielders, both batters, both umpires, the scorer and even a double tea-potted Rob couldn’t hide his smile. After this debacle, our next two bowlers stepped up to the plate, @DARSH and @SIMON (yes, Simon). In need of some wickets, the skipper threw the ball to these two – a genius stroke. Two of our top 3 batting order, turned out to be quite the formidable force with the ball, taking 7 wickets between them to set up a certain someone to finish the days work. Darsh opened up with a brilliant first 4 overs, only conceding 1 run in these first 4, keeping the score down, meant the batters had to go after Simon, a fatal error. Darsh finally got his personal breakthrough in his 7th over by taking a double wicket maiden, taking a good catch off his bowling (I hope you’re still reading Shaunak), followed by a catch by Shaunak 2 balls later. A third wicket in his last over came after a quick stumping from a revitalised Kunal/daddy, this left Darsh with quite the impressive figures of 8-4-18-3. Now, Simon, where do we begin? He began his spell with a wicket maiden after Shaunak (again) took a catch from a drilled drive straight to mid-off. This being said, neither one of them can take the credit for this wicket as Simran had moved himself away from this position just a couple of balls before (we all know that was going down and probably for 4 if he was still there). A wicketless over, followed by another wicket maiden, meant Simon was allowed to keep going. 2 more stumpings for Kunal/daddy and a wicked ball that clipped the bails off the top of the stumps (albeit against someone who was picking up a bat for the first time) meant Simon was on course for a 5fer. He was given one more over to get this, unfortunately, there was no success with the first 5 balls, jug on the line, Simon steams in to deliver ball number 6, a faster ball! Terrible leg side wide, reload, ball number 7, no wicket, dream over. 6-2-30-4. Now, 9 wickets had fallen, what do we all think happens next! Myself, @OMKAR and @ALAN were all loose at this point, eager for a chance to bowl, Alan had even reliably informed Simran that he had 8 overs of googlies available at drinks. But no, the Tail End Bully™ had already got the ball for himself after informing everyone that this was always the plan, even before Simon and Darsh had skittled through the middle order. We were all expecting to wrap it up early as Simran and Rob had engaged in a bowl off to get no.10 and 11 out, Simran of course got 3 overs for every 1 Rob got, but the wicket only came in 39th, when Simran had finally managed to get one straight and take off the bails for the last time in the first innings, ending on 7.2-2-13-1.
Offley posted a respectable 129, after a quick lunch and discussions about my potential TFC, Simon and Alan strode out to lead our charge. A well run double got Simon off the mark on ball 2, followed by Alan looking good and getting off the mark with a boundary in the next over. Both openers were looking strong until the third over when Alan had mistimed a hoik and was caught by a backtracking mid-off, he was sent back for 6. In came the flashier Dixit brother who got his eye in by picking out their extra cover 3 times in a row from 3 half trackers that deserved to be sent back to Pinner. The incredible bowling force were now batting together, could they bring it home for us with the bat as well? Unfortunately, it seemed that Simon was tired of Darsh’s antics and walked across his stumps and was given out LBW, Simon went to join Alan in the early bath, also with 6. In comes the mighty Omkar, back on a ground he loves playing at (as he told us 10+ times). The pair of them seemed to sturdy our rocking ship and put on a nice 35 partnership before our next wicket fell. Having already made 14 runs from the 5 balls so far this over, Darsh was smelling blood and wanted to make that 20 from the over. The ball was short, on middle stump, bread and butter for Darsh, unfortunately, he thought he was playing on the astro pitch and hadn’t accounted for the ball not bouncing and staying at ankle height, Darsh walked back making a strong 21. Just before drinks, we had lost two quick wickets after Nik nicked off (I’ll be here all week guys) and went back for 1, only to be upped by his partner in names, Nick (DUCK EMOJI), who was bowled on the last ball before drinks by their opener, who was bowling his last ball of his 8 overs… not ideal. So, at the 15 over mark, we were not looking pretty at 69-5, once again, an unhappy captain had to get changed back into his whites and get ready for anything. After drinks, I had stepped into the arena with my battle partner, Omkar. At this point, he was soaring, dispatching everything that was thrown at him, he quickly reached his 50 after 42 balls and he kept this pace throughout the rest of the game. Hitting 15 fours, including the most beautiful on-drive I had ever seen. This flew like a bullet past my head, beating long-on and long-off before they even had a chance to move. Omkar ended his innings 71 not out off just 61 balls (could you be available for Sandridge in 3 weeks bud!). After seeing Omkar smashing the ball around and running our planned singles on the 6th ball of every over (almost BBQing myself Chiv-style in the process), I wanted a piece of the action. With 8 runs to win, the very courteous bowler gave me two identical full tosses outside of off stump, letting me hit two great fours through the covers to win it, ending on 15 runs, off 13 balls (arguably more impressive since I was just a spectator to Omkar, but we will discuss this another time).
Another spirited performance today earned us another well earned 30 points, when everything clicks for us, we will be an absolute force to be reckoned with! On our latest instalment on did our skipper drop a catch today, we have a 50/50 as he one that dropped just short of his toes, he has reassured me that no one thinks it was catchable, but I am not so sure. Big thank you to Chiv for scoring, but we have had many people complaining about the illegibleness of your pens/highlighters. @KYARA could you please let Chiv know where to buy some appropriate stationary?

Offley & Stopsley 1 Batting
Player name RunsMB4s6sSR
6nb 8w 18b 5lb 
for 10 wickets
129 (38.2 overs)
D. Giord b  Lawrence 3
R. Piepenstock lbw  Bonneywell 29
S. Boatwright ct  Deshmukh b Pilsbury 19
D. Lunney st  Choksi b Pilsbury 3
C. Rylands st  Choksi b Pilsbury 0
M. Tattersall ct  & b Dixit 28
B. Lyons b  Pilsbury 0
M. Taylor ct  Deshmukh b Dixit 11
P. Gilkes ct  Choksi b Dixit 0
J. Cummins b  Walia 0
S. Denton Not Out  8

Pinner Cricket Club Saturday 2nd XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Simran Walia7.2213113.001.77
Nick Lawrence4.0017117.004.25
Shaunak Deshmukh6.02800.001.33
Rob Bonneywell7.0023123.003.29
Darshan Dixit8.041836.002.25
Simon Pilsbury6.023047.505.00

Pinner Cricket Club Saturday 2nd XI Batting
Player Name RMB4s6sSRCatchesStumpingsRun outs
2nb 3w 1lb 
for 5 wickets
Simon Pilsbury lbw  Cummins 6 16 37.50
Alan Carter ct  Taylor b Denton 6 7 85.71
Darshan Dixit b  Cummins 21 30 70.0 1
Omkar Xetenarvencar Not Out  71 61 116.39
Nik Fong ct  Boatwright b Denton 1 7 14.29
Nick Lawrence b  Cummins 0 4 0
Sam Davies Not Out  15 13 115.38
Simran Walia  
Rob Bonneywell  
Kunal Choksi   3
Shaunak Deshmukh   2

Offley & Stopsley 1 Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
J. Cummins8.0144314.675.50
S. Denton8.0234217.004.25
D. Lunney3.002100.007.00
M. Tattersall3.002100.007.00
P. Gilks1.00900.009.00